Learn Chinese in 5 Minutes

(Better if you read them out loud, or they may not make much sense)


ENGLISH WAY ---- CHINESE WAY

Thats not right --- Sum Ting Wong

Are you harboring a fugitive --- Hu Yu Hai Ding

See me ASAP --- Kum Hia Nao

Stupid Man --- Dum Fuk

Small horse --- Tai Ni Po Ni

Did you go to the beach? --- Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped in to a coffee table --- Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

I think you need a face lift --- Chin Tu Fat

Its very dark in here--- Wao So Dim

I thought you were on a diet --- Wai Yu Mun Ching

This is a tow away zone --- No Pah King

Staying out of sight --- Lei Ying Lo

He's cleaning his automobile ---- Wa Shing Ka

Your body odor is offensive --- Yu Stin Ki Pu

Great --- Fa Kin Su Pah Whats up --- Wa Sa Pen Ing

For the losers who didnt get it --- Yu fa kin dum

Lessons in Logic

If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
It's your stupidity.

.........................................................................

I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.

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Practice makes perfect.....
But nobody's perfect......
so why practice?

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If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?

.........................................................................


Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.

.........................................................................


How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?

.........................................................................


Money is not everything.
There's Master card & Visa.

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Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.

.........................................................................


Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in
life.

.........................................................................


The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.

.........................................................................


Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.

.........................................................................


Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.

.........................................................................


"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep

.........................................................................


There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning

.........................................................................


"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk

.........................................................................


"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours

.........................................................................


God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.

.........................................................................


The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.


.........................................................................

A bus station is where a bus stops.

A train station is where a train stops.

On my desk, I have a work station....
what more can I say........

a new style of writing loveletters

My dear FAIR and LOVELY (ek chand ka tukda) Single Rose, after WIPRO (Applying Thought) so much ,I dare to say that You are my TVS SCOOTY (First love)Beating and my AIWA (Pure passion). I always BPL (Believe in the best) Yo and you are SANSUI (Better than the best).Image You are DOMINO'S PIZZA (Delivering a million smiles) Hysterical for me. This is a COLGATE ENERGY GEL (Seriously fresh )Braces feeling for me.
I want you to be my life partner but I think you are worried about your father who is KAWASAKI BAJAJ CALIBER (The Unshakable)Bagpipes and my father who is CEAT (Born Tough)Handcuffed but don't worry as I am also FORD ICON (The Josh Machine) Programmerand rest of our family members are KELVINATORS (The Coolest ones). Bouncy

If they say no, we will run away and marry and PHILIPS (Let's Make Things Better). They will feel MIRINDA (Zor ka jhatka dhire se lage) Club Mebut I believe in COCA COLA (Jo chahe ho jaye). Prisoner For our marriage SAMSUNG DIGITALL Image(Everyone's Invited) and after marriage we'll be WHIRLPOOLImage (U and ME - The World's best homemakers)

Trust in God who's always NOKIA (Connecting people) TV 2 who love each other. And we are WILLS (Made for each other) Hug And Kiss. Now that HYUNDAI (we are listening)Mix Master the song of love, you must know that love is DAIRY MILK (Real taste of life) Chocolates, SATYAM ONLINE (Fun, Fast, Easy ) Smashyand PARX (Always Comfortable). SleepingSo never forget me. Ok bye!Image

I wrote little but PEPSI (Yeh dil mange more). Cheers

LG (Digitally Yours) Tuxedo Heart!!!!!Image
bye byeImage

the freaking F's

Try this ..
This will blow your mind...!

Just do it - don't cheat!!!!!!! !!!!!

Try this its actually quite good.

But don't cheat!

Count the number of F's in the following text in
15 seconds:

FINISHED FILES ARE THE
RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC
STUDY COMBINED WITH THE
EXPERIENCE OF YEARS



Managed it?

Scroll down only after you have counted them!



OK?



How many?



Three? (You r definitely male!!!)




Wrong, there are six - no joke!










Read again!



FINISHED FILES ARE THE
RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC
STUDY COMBINED WITH THE
EXPERIENCE OF YEARS



The reasoning is further down...

The MALE brain cannot process the word "OF".



Incredible or what?

donald trump & saddam hussain

yesterday 12/14/2006, on an exclusive interview on the big idea. DONALD TRUMP said,
" killing is always a bad thing, but SADDAM HUSSAIN used to kill terrorist. removing him from IRAQ made iraq a breeding grounds for terrorism. and the new leader will make SADDAM HUSSAIN look like a good guy."

shocking?

get this

once you eat gober
you never get sober.......

once a crackhead , always a crackhead......one of the people who were comming to the bank changed herself completely and now its back to crack again.

anyways on thanksgiving day, i got a ticket for skipping a redlight, again.
this time dad was with me.......damn

Indian automaker looks to enter U.S. market

Indian automaker looks to enter U.S. market
Working with U.S. distributor, company plans to sell SUVs and pickups.
November 14 2006: 1:47 PM EST


DETROIT (Reuters) -- Indian automaker Mahindra & Mahindra Ltd.is looking to enter the U.S. market and has signed an agreement with independent distributor Global Vehicles U.S.A. Inc., a spokesman for the distributor said on Monday.

Mahindra plans to launch two vehicles, a pickup truck and a sports utility vehicle called the Scorpio, in the United States in 2008, spokesman Tom Persons of Alpharetta, Georgia-based Global Vehicles told Reuters.

"We are looking at pretty aggressive volumes," Persons said, but he declined to give a specific target.

He said Global Vehicles will announce more details in mid-April. The company is headed by former Mazda executive William Geotze.

A Mahindra spokespeople could not be immediately reached for comment, Reuters and industry newspaper Automotive News said. The company already sells tractors in the United States.

Formed in 1945 to make Willys Jeeps in India, Mahindra has cornered nearly half the market for utility vehicles and is the world's No. 4 tractor maker. But it is among the smaller automakers in the global market.

Mahindra sold 127,521 vehicles last year, according to Automotive News.

Global Vehicles, under the name Cross Lander USA, had previously planned to introduce a Romanian SUV into the U.S., according to a report in Automotive News.

The company called off that plan, the report said, citing opposition and corruption among Romanian government officials. By that time, Cross Lander had already signed on 130 dealers and accepted security deposits, according to Automotive News.

The company refunded the deposits of dealers who wanted to back out, according the newspaper. Automotive news quoted Geotze as saying, last week, that the company had pledged to find a new vehicle to sell for those dealers who wished to stay in.

desi husband

DESI husband - relax and enjoy a laugh

4 husbands were sitting at the waiting room in a
hospital while
waiting
for their wives birth giving.

Then a nurse came out and told to the first
daddy,

"congratulation, you got twins!".
"Ohh.. maybe its a coincident" said the daddy. "I
am working with
the Petronas
Twin Towers".

Then another nurse came out and told to the
second daddy,

"congratulation! you have triplets!"
"Wooow!, this is a coincident too" said the
second daddy. ? "I am
working for

3M Corporation"

Another nurse came out and told the third daddy, ?

"Congratulation! Isteri you dapat kembar empat,"
"Alhamdulillah! Maybe this is also a coincident".
"I kerja di

Four Season Hotel!"

While, the fourth daddy-to-be were in
uncontrolled worry.
All the 3 daddies asked him,
why are you seems so worry??"

He answered, "I am working with Seven-Eleven! "